Thursday, January 12, 2017

Hide and Go Shriek, Teens, a Slasher, and Furniture

In the tradition of Chopping Mall we have more great looking teens with a brilliant idea.  Instead of a mall, we visit a furniture store where four hunks and four babes have a sure fire idea for an orgy.  When teen-aged hormones talk, nothing can go wrong!  As the lingerie and boxers fly off, decapitations and impalement cannot be far behind. Today we look at 1988's "Hide and Go Shriek," directed by Skip Schoolnik.
Dead woman of the night
They've just graduated high school and their horny.  Only one thing to do...sneak into a furniture store as it closes and have lots of pre-marital sex.  Yeah, I know, we've all done it.  Kim (Annette Sinclair) seems to be the head skank with lots of experience in pre-marital sex.  She has some very slinky linger ie which she lends to virgin Malissa (Ria Pavia).  Enough of the backstories, let's fast-forward to the orgy.  Oh, by the way, some transvestite (Scott Kubay) has knifed a prostitute  (Robin Turk) just after the opening credits. More on him later. As the frolicking begins, head skank Kim has a brilliant idea.  Play Hide and Seek!  Fortunately for our virile and potent teens, this does not hamper their ability to have pre-marital sex.  What does hamper their amorous activities is a slasher that is also in the store.  One by guessed it...the killer starts picking off the teens.
In underwear, or boxers, or completely nude, the beautiful begin to fall.  Malissa has her head bashed in and her beau, Shawn (Scott Fults) is spiked, and the carnage begins.  The rest of the kills are quite imaginative, as one poor schmuck will be impaled by a mannequin arm, and another decapitated by an elevator.  Eventually the survivors realize they are being hunted, but by who?  What of the aforementioned transvestite?  Is he in the store?  Throw in another suspect or two and we have a fun version of Hide and Seek.
The Nude Kim in much peril
Will our teens mount a counter-strike and turn the tables on their nemesis?  Will head-skank, and almost always topless Kim suffer the cruelest death of all her friends because of her immoral persona?  Will 1980s Hollywood seek to vilify the psycho-transvestite community in this slasher film?  There will be lots of gratuitous nudity, some exotic strip-teases, imaginative gore, and more gratuitous nudity in this slasher offering.  Ignore all the bore-athons from this month's Golden Globes show and enjoy the carnal pleasures of "Hide and Go Shriek."

No comments:

Post a Comment